My rant.

Dads, stop breaking your sons and daughters, please, I beg of you. I feel a need to write this post after what I witnessed at Target yesterday. Forgive me for a post written in anger. I know it’s long, but this is something that needs to be said, it’s something that needs to be heard. It’s something that needs to be shared.

As my son, Logan and I stood in line to pay, I watched as a little boy who couldn’t have been older than six, looked up at his dad and asked very timidly if they could buy some ice cream when they were done. The father glared at him, growled at the boy to ”leave him alone and be quiet”. The boy quickly cowered to the wall where he stood motionless and hurt for some time, and after some time, he eventually joined his father as he seemed to have forgotten the anger he had just shown.

The father again turned and scolded the boy for making too much noise. The boy again shrunk back and cowered against the wall. I was agitated. I was confused. How could this man not see what I see? How could this man not see what a beautiful and precious gift stood in his shadow? How could this man be so quick to extinguish all happiness in his own boy? How could this man not cherish the only time he’ll ever have to be everything to this boy? To be the person that matters most to this boy?

The boy started to come towards his dad yet again. His dad immediately stepped out of the line, jammed his fingers into his son’s collar bones until he winced in pain, and threatened him. “If you so much as make a sound or come off of that wall again, I promise you’re going to get it when we get home.” The boy again cowered against the wall. This time, he didn’t move. He didn’t make a sound. His beautiful face pointed down, locked to the floor and expressionless. He had been broken. And that’s how his father wanted it. He didn't want to deal with him, and breaking him was the easiest way. And we wonder why so many of our kids grow up to be screwed up.

Loving my son, being there for my son, teaching my son, touching my son, playing with my son, being with my son… these aren't tasks that only super dads can perform. These are tasks that every dad should perform. Always. Without fail. There is nothing special about that. I am a dad who loves his son and would literally do anything for his well-being, safety, and health. I would gladly take a bus through my body or a bullet in the face before I cut my own son down or make him feel that way and I am far from a perfect dad, husband, son, brother, or friend.

But I'll make sure my son will always feel bigger than anything life can throw at him. Why? Because I get it. I get the power a dad has in a child’s life, and in a child’s level of self-belief. I get that everything I ever do and ever say to my son will be absorbed, for good or for bad. What I don’t get is how some dads don’t get it…

Dads. Don't your faces light up when you first see your child in the morning or when you come home from work? Do you not understand that a child’s entire sense of value can revolve around what they see in your face when you first see them? I see it, and it's not hard to see. And if you don't, you're blind, please give up your parenthood, and move on.

Do you not realize that a child is what you tell them they are? That people almost always become what they are labeled? Do you really believe that your child is an idiot? Because he now does. Think about that. Because you said it, he now believes it. Bravo, good job.